little do you know,
i’m still up at 3.45 AM, wondering where it all went wrong.


“she embraced the silence which burned like whiskey
at the pit of her stomach.
the wind howled and called out to her,
it swears that she’s not good enough and
will never be enough.”

Don’t try to love if you don’t know how to.

If you can’t love her with all you got, please let her go. You need to be the one thing in her life that’s always there, the constant. There’ll be days when she needs you there at 3 in the morning telling her she’ll be okay and that there’s nothing to worry about. Your arms should be her home and ONLY for her. Your smile should be her heaven on earth. Please love her for all she is, even if she has scars from the past she can never get along with.

But if you can’t do all this for your girl, please don’t waste her time. You need to be the person to kindle her spark, not dim her lights.

I’m the master mind at breaking my own heart
with the simplicity of thoughts
that are almost impossible to achieve
I’m still in love with you
or perhaps it was just the memories
we made together

although you will only remember
the colour of her eyes
the smoothness of her skin
and the beauty of her hair
i will always remember how madly in love
i was with you and
i still am
but this has taken a toll on me
and it’s gnawing away
a part of my soul day by day

Backyard Door

My chest feels empty and vacant

I thought I had a heart

but i happened to lose it on the way somehow

when i turned behind i realized

it left a trail of crimson red blood

and when I decided to follow it

it led straight to your backyard door


How many times have I

contemplated running away from 

the misery of this earth 

to me, it just seems like i’m hellbound

this place crushes all my emotions

that i have left of me 

any source of happiness 

or a link to inspiration and hope 

now, i wonder what to do

because no matter how and

what i try 

I will never forgive myself 

for letting myself be scarred 

or for allowing demons 

to voraciously devour 

the remains of my soul


{ a.k }